I wrote this post more than a year ago but never actually published it. Not sure why. Perhaps I was worried about a backlash, perhaps his behaviour changed for the better, for that day at least. Whatever the reason, despite being older and more able to discuss actions and consequences, I still need ideas for modifying his behaviour.
Mike and I were never really for or against SMACKING as a punishment. And please note, I am talking about open hand smack, with no implement, here.
My thoughts were that the behaviour modifying aspect was really just behaving well to avoid pain, so not the best motivator for good behaviour.
But then again, my parents smacked me and I think I turned out ok (with a good dose of goody-two-shoes thrown in as well).
The issue never really came up with Megan. She is very like me and does what she is told because she doesn’t want to get in trouble. Growling is severe enough for Megan.
But Alex is a whole different story. Growling doesn’t work, explaining consequences doesn’t work, taking things away from him doesn’t work, time out doesn’t work…are you seeing the pattern???
I have caved a few times, under pressure and smacked Alex. And I have felt so bad about it afterwards. Like I have let him and myself down.
And what does it say to Alex? “Mum says I can’t hit, but she can” ?? And he does hit- is that my fault?
And what else can I do when he won’t stop yelling, squealing, hiting, throwing?
Because I can definately add smacking to the list of things that “doesn’t work”!!